You Gotta Be Kidding Me 1.02

The mercury was just creeping up over 2-degrees this morning when I rolled into work-- coldest temperature in St. Louis in over 10-years. As I turned the corner past the receptionist and down the main hallway toward my work station, I was unwrapping myself from the several layers of scarves, coats and hoodies, when I stopped, face-to-face, with a young man coming out of the break room with his cup of warm beverage of some kind.

I was certain to pardon myself as I did not want him to spill on himself, the floor or, most importantly me, and quickly went on about my way. As far as I was concerned, a long, drawn-out conversation was not needed because, although this guy had worked in our office of about 100 employees for a little over a year, I knew his name and said, "Hi, how you doin'?" in passing before, we didn't really work together or socialize, we had nothing in common, I was running a little late due to a stalled car on the highway and I am not big on the small talk, anyway.

He just couldn't leave well enough alone, however, and had to come back with the witty, "Cold enough for you?" I stammered for something to say, not expecting to be presented with such a deep question at 8:02 A.M... "No, I was hoping we would get to see negative numbers today"... "It's not the cold, but the humidity, that will get you"... "You know that is 14-degrees in dog-temperature"... didn't come to me until later. All I could think of at the time was, "Yeah, Buddy!" followed by a, "you, tool"... under my breath.

Why can't anyone just go about there business and not say anything when you don't have to? Why is it that, when found in an uncomfortable situation, we often have the need to just blurt out the first thing that comes to mind? Has the phrase Silence is Golden lost it's impact with the falling prices of precious metals?

I had only been working-out at the YMCA for about a week when I realized that there was an unwritten routine and an etiquette that one needs to follow. Among other things, certain people are in certain places and doing certain things at certain times-- like clockwork. It didn't take too many dirty looks before I figured out that, at 6:05, treadmills #4, 5 and 9, and elliptical machines #1 and 6 are available, but by 6:15 all of the ellipticals are being used, however, treadmill #5 is still open and #6 and 7 have opened up, too.

It took a little longer to grasp the pecking order in the locker room. Grown men can be pretty territorial when it comes to changing spaces. It is best to search for a spot without padlocks on, at least, four adjacent lockers, in each direction. In addition, you should try to keep to yourself and never speak unless first spoken to. You may, however, give a head-nod or hand-raise, accompanied by a low-volume and -tone grunt or an inaudible, questioning mumble as a salutation upon coming or going.

After two-and-a-half months of-- over-an-hour-long workouts, five-days-a-week-- not talking to a single soul, I really thought that I had become invisible or something. Perhaps, since it was early, I had morning breath, but I never opened my mouth enough for anyone to get a whiff. Can people really go for months without interacting with anyone? Maybe it just takes a while for individuals to warm-up to each other and feel comfortable sharing conversation? It could just be me, though, because I have actually seen people in the gym talking to each other, and on one occasion I could even hear words coming out of their mouths and smiles on their faces!

In fact, there is one guy that must have been a member for many years as there has been more than one occurrence that I have seen him talking with more than one person. For weeks, I would see him make his rounds and say, "good morning", to other members, but not a word to me... until that faithful day just after Christmas...

With the holiday upon us, the Y was going to take care of some maintenance issues while they were less busy between Christmas and New Years. Among the things on their "to-do" list was replace the shower heads in the men's locker room, so they shut down half of the plumbing at a time to make repairs. Although there were, definitely, less people working out during the holiday, it was still a bit crowded in the very early morning and with some of the facilities unavailable, the guys were cramped in the tight quarters. Instead of leaving one or two stations between bathers, some were forced to do the normally unthinkable, and shower right next to another man.

I wasn't too very freaked out about this as, since I was exposed to a lot of new experiences when I had the stroke, I had become much less inhibited. I couldn't help but feel a little uneasy, though, when the dude that was always friendly to everyone else but me, pulled up to the shower-station next to me and said, "How you doing? I'm John." 

In my shock and embarrassment, I was unsure if he stuck out his hand and I was too afraid to look so I just squeaked out out a quick, "Good. Scott." and went on about my business. Is it considered rude to not shake the hand of a naked man? It has been awkward and we haven't said a word since-- just the occasional head-nod and grunt in passing.

I'm not sure if you understand or not. There are rules! Men do not visit the bathroom in pairs like women. They do not speak to each other or look anywhere but straight ahead when they are using a urinal so I would assume that the same would also apply to public showers. Maybe he was from a different Country or something?

About a year ago, I was still in therapy but progressing very well so they put me in a group psychology session that met every Friday at lunch-time. The group consisted of usually 6-10 other patients that had suffered brain injuries of some kind and were getting ready to get back into their everyday routine in the real world so there was a variety of people attending in the eight-weeks or so that I participated.

On this particular Friday, I was dropped-off by my driver a bit early which was both unusual and advantageous because I really had to use the restroom. I did my best to limp past the meeting room down the hall towards the lavatory as quickly as possible when I approached a guy that I recognized as being part of the group but he had not been there in several weeks. I gave him a head-nod and a "how-ya-doin'" as I hobbled past him and he mumbled something back that I didn't pay attention to as I reached my goal and turned into the bathroom.

I entered the middle of three stalls with a big sigh of relief that I held back as I heard the door squeak open and someone else come in. I sat quietly and, through the space between the door and the frame, saw the gentleman, slowly passed my stall and occupy the one right next to me-- serves me right for picking the middle one. I now tried to delay my business as I didn't want to draw attention to myself with someone sitting right next to me.

And then he said, "Hey, how you doing?"

Stunned I replied, "Pretty good... How are you?" not thinking that the conversation would go any further... but it did... "Alright. So what are you up to?"

OK, so this is really freaking me out and I thinking, "Don't answer. This is nuts. Don't answer."

But I say, "Well, I have a group psych session and had a few minutes to kill so I thought that I would come in here and take care of my busin..."

But he cut me off with, "What time are you going to be there?" and at this point I'm thinking, "Yeah this is crazy that we are having a conversation in the stalls in the men's room, but you started it and now your cutting me off? That is just rude, but again, I answer, "Well, group starts at noon, but they usually run a little late so I've got..." and this time I stop, myself as I hear him say,

"Hey, I'm going to have to let you go because there some moron in the stall next to me that thinks I'm talking to him.

I didn't even finish what I started and left as quick as I could without making another sound. I was glad that none of my group partners were there to see me make a fool of myself. As we were getting ready to start, the guy that I saw in the hallway came in, plopped himself down in the chair next to me and said, in a very familiar voice, "Hey, how you doing?"

We had a good laugh about it after the session and then I never saw (or heard) him again.

I know this story is so good that it sounds like a joke. In fact, someone emailed me a similar story, shortly after the event occurred. The only proof that I have that it really happened is that guy that was there-- maybe he started the email about me.

Sometimes it's just better to say nothing.

Read This. Buy T-shirts. Peace.

From the Bottom of My Heart

I am looking forward to the special sharing service at our church tonight. There will be two worship sets of four songs each, with an open mic opportunity for individuals to stand before the congregation and say what they are thankful for. 

In past years, there would be little chance that I would even be there, much less, opening up publicly in front of all those people. Not because it is one of the biggest party nights of the year, because I haven't really partied in years, but because it would be an understatement to say that I don't feel comfortable speaking in front of large groups of people (although I am OK singing in front of crowds, but that story is for another day).

This year, however, I feel compelled to give praise where praise is do and try to pass on the understanding and enlightenment that I have learned from my experiences over the past year to anyone else who will listen. I see it going something like this:

I am thankful that I had a stroke. I know that may sound a little strange as I could be thankful for so many other things like that I have had such a remarkable recovery and, although it was hard, I am here and I can walk and talk and do most anything that I could do before. I could be thankful that I have such an wonderful wife and awesome son or that we are going to have another little miracle in February and we are all happy and healthy for the most part. I could be thankful that I have family and so many, many friends that love and care for us and a decent enough job in these tough economic times that we can have all that we need and most of what we want. I could be thankful, as well, for hundreds of other things as little as the ability to play RockBand and as big as the giant hugs from my best buddy in the whole world.

Don't get me wrong... I am so very thankful for all of these things, no matter how big or small, but if it wasn't for that short time last November that I was sure that I had lost so many of the things that we daily take for granted, I wouldn't be up here thanking God for all that he has given me. To be perfectly honest, I would be sitting out there half-listening to someone else share and partly thinking about why turkey makes you so sleepy or what tight-end to start on my fantasy football team tomorrow or where I am going to find a Wii before Christmas.

I know this because last year I had just as much, if not more, to be thankful for. As far as I knew, I was on top of the world and everything was going great until a minuscule little piece of plaque became lodged in a blood vessel in my brain. I discovered that everything I had learned about control in my life was wrong because, before that moment, I thought that I was in control. From that point on, however, I didn't matter how strong I was, how smart I was, how determined I was or even how lucky I was, I knew that I was in control of nothing. 

Nothing I did made a difference of how quickly I was going to be able to do all those things I had been taking for granted for so long-- and I tried just about everything. Although we saw a little bit of progress with the rehabilitation almost every day, there were a few weeks of frustration before, with a broken spirit, I gave up on myself and gave it all to God. 

What took me so long? Stubbornness, pride, ignorance... all of the things that I had thought made me tough and gave me good character. I don't know for sure but I suppose I liked myself pretty much before the event and, honestly, didn't know that I was going about a lot of things in the wrong way.

I know that God doesn't give us anything we cannot handle. I know that what doesn't kills us will make us stronger. I know that God loves us, wants the best for us and that we should give all of our problems to Him. I know, even though I do not totally understand how, His grace transcends all worldly things. It just took a massive brain injury for me to truly understand what all of this meant-- God is in control and the more we fight that fact or try to take control from Him, the harder and more painful it is going to be.

I would not wish what I went through an anyone else but I think it was the most sincere learning experience in my whole life and I am truly a better person for it as I have three new Ps-- new perspective, new priorities and new passion. I hope that you too can find your little stroke that helps you see what we should be thankful for.

Be Thankful. Read This. Buy T-shirts. Peace.

Monday Morning Quarterback 1.09

Back to the Monday Morning Quarterback thing after a full three-days of pushing my Squidoo lens promoting public awareness of Chiropractic Stroke. If you didn't get a chance to read it you definitely should-- especially if someone you care about visits a Chiropractor. The story generated over 100 hits on the blog from 37 unique visitors who, hopefully, forwarded it on to others that will read it soon and forward it... and so on, and so on, and so on.

I am encouraged that it did so well but I am still looking for ways to take the Site viral. Anything that any readers can do would be tremendously helpful as I am only one person with a job and a family and hoses that need to be taken into the garage before we get our first freeze of the season tonight. SkeetzTeez is doing pretty decent too. Looks like it is going to be our biggest month yet:

Top five keywords that resulted in visits to SkeetzTeez or SkeetzTeez Blog:

5. Jonas Brothers and Sarahcuda (tie)

4. Trivia

3. Chiropractor

2. Stroke

1. Suck for a Buck

Top five designs sold at SkeetzTeez:

5. I Survived a Major Brain Injury and All I Got was this Lousy T-shirt

4. Saturday Night Live- Schweddy Balls

3. McCain/Palin (McMaverick/Sarahcuda)

2 Big Brother (Sister)

1. Slapshot- Charlestown Chiefs

I couldn't figure out the run on Charlestown Chiefs T-shirts until I realized that they were selling in threes-- the kids are buying them to dress as the Hanson Brothers for Halloween; every time I think the McCain/Palin design is done, I sell another one; and I don't understand how trivia often makes it on the search list as I don't have anything directly relating to the subject. Maybe I should! Notes from the weekend:

• Since when did all suspects become Persons of Interest? Would you be more willing to turn yourself in if you were named a person of interest rather than the suspect-- whether you were guilty or not? To me, they are one in the same.

• Did I miss when they moved the end Daylight Savings Time? I thought it was always before Halloween. 

• What ever happened to taking things you found around the house and making your Halloween costume? You have to spend a fortune on something the kids are going to wear, if your lucky, a couple of hours.

• Have you seen the adults' costumes available? They are either too gross or too revealing. The women's outfits look like hussies, harlots, hookers or whores.

• Do 11-year-olds need to bring two forms of identification? A local municipality passed legislation limited trick-or-treaters to 12 and under between the hours of 5:30 and 8:00. That should open up the streets for vandalism for all the 14-year-olds after 9:00.

• How is that working for you?

• Why does no one use the word hussy anymore... or harlot, for that matter?

• Isn't it about time that we can vote over the Web? The Internet has made the gathering of information, in almost every form, many times easier for both the gatherer and the provider. Why can't they come up with a way to vote in general elections that way too?

• Do you think the media, not the advertisements but through polls and such, influence the elections? I tend to think hearing poll results can make a difference how people vote or, even more notably, deter them to vote altogether because they assume that the race has already been decided and their candidate has either won-- and doesn't need the extra vote, or lost-- and

the vote is wasted.

• When is this season going to end? Looks like the World Series is going to drag on for, at least, another day or two because of rain, of all things. Get your Old Time Baseball T-shirt while you can before I switch it over to the Old Time Football Design.

• Who would've guessed? Our Fantasy Football team defeated the guys in first place this week, climbed out of the cellar and are only three-and-a-half games out of the lead halfway through the season.

• What should we name our new baby boy? Vote over there somewhere ------->

That's all for me tonight. I work-out and diet for good health but, because of the regimen, I am too tired to enjoy it.

Read this. Buy T-shirts. Peace.

It Only Seems Fair

It's time to take a break from the regularly-scheduled, fun-filled, witty insight usually provided on this forum to allow me to address an issue that is very important to me. I have been working on this post for some time now but have saved it until today because I wanted to make sure I got my point across without sounding like a whining fool. I have scheduled this article to publish on a Friday afternoon so most readers will have a chance to spend a few minutes reading over it in the next three days and, if they choose to do so, take action upon it.

I have been having fun writing this blog for the last-- let's see... how long has it been?-- three months or so. I started writing to, primarily, promote my cafepress shop, SkeetzTeez-- which I started after recovering from the stroke to explore some different creative outlets. I have found that the blog was something else artistic that I could do, too, that in many ways was even more creative. There are tons of other designers out there and, although there stuff isn't quite as cool as mine, we are basically all selling the same designs on the same merchandise while I can do my own thing with the blog... in my own style.

It's hard for an artist of any kind to get enough challenge and creative stimulus in the corporate environment. There is just not enough opportunity to act on an imaginative impulse when you are restricted by client branding standards, industry principles and business etiquette. In addition, after the life changing event that I experienced (the doctors said I took a life-inventory), I was questioning my value and the value of everything I did. I made a promise to myself that I was not going to do anything that didn't mean... something.

As I got back into my regular routine and further away from the life-and-death situation, however, my commitment to my new ideals got weaker, but the search for inspiration with the additional projects that I was involved with was paying off. It was easier to accept the medial tasks, administrative responsibilities and office politics at work all day because in the evenings and on the weekend I was able to get my fill of, what I would consider, more creative projects-- producing designs that I thought other people would like.

It's not quite fine art but at least it is art for it's own sake instead of art trying to sell something else for somebody I don't even know and, I'm sure, could care less about me. I can feel, somewhat, better for that. Additional benefits include all of the things I'm learning about business, marketing and the Internet and we can't forget that my sales have been pretty strong and I hope to turn a few bucks over the gift-giving season.

Although my brain attack was the driving factor behind all of this, as I have written on many occasions, I didn't want my blog, or anything else that I was doing to be all about the stroke. Information that I have come upon recently, though, has made me rethink this.

People under the age of 45-50 that visit a chiropractor for neck adjustments are 3-9 times more likely to have a stroke than people who don't get chiropractic treatment. Several studies support similar findings with only the factors of age and how much more common incidents of severe events occurring differing. 

I was seeing a chiropractor twice a week in the couple of months leading up to my stroke. I was being treated for middle- and upper-back pain and part of that treatment included cervical spinal adjustments. For those that have never experienced a procedure like this, it consists of the patient, lying on his or her back on a specially designed table, trying to remain relaxed as the chiropractor gently takes the patient's head with both hands, rolls it around to find the correct position and then, quickly and sharply (some would say violently) snaps the head to one side. Then he repeats the same process on the other side.

Studies of stroke patients reveal a wide spectrum of results that lend credit to both sides of the argument about whether or not this procedure ultimately contributes to the brain attack. In my opinion, as an individual that has been exposed to neck manipulation dozens of times, is that this is, by far, much more traumatic on the physical structure of the cervical spine than the action of shampooing a person's hair in a hairdresser's wash basin. You are more likely, however, to have heard that many believe there is some risk of the gentle, common, salon practice causing a stroke because the cosmetologist community doesn't have the money-- and therefore, the lawyers and the power-- that the chiropractic alliance has to keep it quiet.

I like my chiropractor. He is an acquaintance of my sister and her husband, who set me up with him for an emergency appointment the day before my wedding. Leading up to the big day, my nerves and the stress got to me, my back seized-up and I couldn't move. I credit him for the fact that I had any mobility on one of the most important days of my life. I won't go as far as to definitely blame him for my stroke but I do absolutely believe that snap to my neck caused my stroke.

The way I understand it, there are two arteries, the vertebral arteries, that run straight up the back of the neck and through two holes in the sides of each neck vertebra. When the head turns the artery is kinked and the delicate inner lining can tear. Sometimes the damage is immediate and the patient collapses right there. Sometimes mild symptoms start immediately and progress over the hours after the patient leaves the chiropractor. If the tear is small, it will clot over then, days later, the clot breaks off, travels to the brain and causes a stroke. This is what happened to me and, because of the delay, I didn't associate the two events until months later.

Chiropractors are aware of the risk but claim that it only occurs in one in a million manipulations and there is no more chance of having a stroke after chiropractic treatment as there is after visiting a general practitioner. They pro-actively spin a web of deception, throwing major dollars at propaganda campaigns to defend their position and guerrilla marketing tactics with commentary on common Internet social networks as well as their own underground forums disguised to look like public service announcements. I would not be surprised at all to soon find replies on this post from, so-called, doctors of sport medicine, denying any responsibility for such things by any member of their profession.

The complex system they have established and the massive budgets they have to work with are why I have broken from my "don't talk about the stroke" attitude and decided to write this post. It is why I have taken up the cause to inform as many people as possible about the victim's' side of the story.

Commercials on TV for women's birth control state all the benefits of a particular medication and then take the last few seconds to say something to the effect of, "this drug may cause strokes in some individuals. If you have a history of stroke, high-blood pressure or if you smoke, the risk is greater...". Then I think they go as far as to say, "... and you should not take this medication". I am not asking the chiropractic associations to go that far, but I do think it's only fair that they openly tell their patients that some studies show there is a possibility that the treatment they are going to subject you to may be hazardous to your health. Why are they not held accountable for, professionally, giving the public the information they need to make a well informed-- possibly life-or-death-- decision? 

Shortly after I was well enough to go home and continue with out-patient rehabilitation, I received a call from my Sports Medicine Doctor's Office. They did that from time-to-time if I hadn't been in for several weeks for an adjustment. I still wasn't speaking very well, at the time, but answered the phone, anyway, because I needed the practice. I could tell from the lady's voice on the other end of the line that she had no problem understanding me. Although my speech was a little slurred, as soon as she heard the word stroke, she dropped me like I was hot. I considered it a bit rude at the time, but thought it must have been because of the shock that I young man like me-- so active and full of life-- could be struck down by a horrible event like that. It didn't occur to me until later that it may have been some remote feeling of responsibility or just the mere avoidance of any liability that cut our conversation short. Funny that I never heard from the office again. You would think that, in my physical condition-- and all-- I would need some good therapy.

I have done a lot of research and have found enough evidence to convince myself. Others that have heard my story have thought enough of it that they, too, have discontinued chiropractic visits. I am, now, committed to the cause spreading my story, plus the stories of other victims so those hearing them can have enough information to form an educated opinion, become committed themselves and tell someone else.

I have developed a Squidoo Web Page to provide a resource for stroke survivors and their loved ones as well as chiropractic patients and anyone in the general public that can find it on their heart to care. The page contains video, books and other material related on strokes and stroke recovery. It also includes a list of links with valuable information about chiropractic stroke and a Guestbook to provide feedback. I hope to develop a network of patients, caregivers, doctors and advocates in this community to provide input, encourage discussion and offer support between members.

I hope this project can be a forum for all interested parties to gather and exchange information and bring awareness to the general public and potential patients-- or victims. I am going to get behind this because I think it is important, but as I do, I feel it is also important that it doesn't bother the readers of this blog or individuals in any of the many other networks I have gotten involved in. I will, however, occasionally, ask for your help.

Please take a moment and visit the Strokes and Chiropractor page. Please go through some of the information and see what you think. Please forward this blog entry to anyone that you know that you think would care-- especially anyone that visits the chiropractor (click the envelope with the arrow at the bottom of the story). Please sign the guestbook, leave your comments (click comments below), favorite and bookmark (in the side bar on the right side) the pages, give it a high rating and spread the word about it in anyway that you feel you can. I will never give away any of your personal information to anyone at any price and you may post anonymously if you wish.

If you know me-- even if it is only from this blog-- you know this is important to me and I hope you can tell that I wish no ill will on the people trying to make a living in chiropractic practices. I just want what should only be fair... for patients to be told of the possible consequences of that kind of treatment and be able to make the decision to continue care after knowing all the facts. I wasn't given that opportunity. Hey-- there are people that stroke out and die, right there, on the table! I am so thankful to God that I am blessed with a second chance. I want to do something with that chance... and this is my chance.

I don't expect to gain a thing... except the satisfaction of, maybe, helping one other person to not have to go through the challenges that other victims and I face every day.

I have never been a good public speaker so I can't make an impact on the national talk show circuit. Although I can write a bit, I don't think this story is going to be featured on Google's Blog of the Day. I can carry a tune and throw a decent slider with a Wiffleball but neither of those skills are going to help with this cause. The one thing that I do have going for me, though, is that when I put my mind to something and am willing to put some hard work into it, I can find a way to accomplish most anything. I also am privileged to know the best, most caring people in whole world that I know are going to help... because they have done it before.

Not to pressure you to take action but... what have you got to lose? My hope is that something magical happens and this thing goes viral in the next couple of weeks-- an I tell two friends and they tell two friends and they tell two friends, Pay It Forward, kind of deal. 

If you spread the word, I cannot guarantee you three wishes, a day of good luck for every person you forward the email to or that total strangers will send you money, but you may be able to have the satisfaction of passing the email on to someone in your address book, who emailed it to a guy at work, who told his wife to check out the Site, who mentioned it to a woman at church, who's son had recently been in a car accident and gotten the number of a Sports Medicine Doctor and has his first appointment for evaluation on Monday morning... so he can ask the chiropractor about the risk of being harmed by the procedure he is about to go through and expect an honest answer-- It only seems fair.

Thanks for your help. Peace.

Squidoo Lens on Chiropractic Stroke

Note to those in the chiropractic profession: I am not a doctor. I am not a writer. I am, however, an individual who had a stroke and I strongly believe that stroke was caused by chiropractic treatment. You have every right to believe something else and every right to dispute me. You have the right to remind the public that you have a diploma and boast about your years of experience. I respect your right to criticize my grammar and even to write that I am a whining fool... but not here-- this is our forum... the individuals that have gone through the experience. 

You can believe that one severe brain injury out of a million-- a statistic that I sincerely believe is grossly understated because incidents like mine that are not included in the stats as the association was not made early enough-- is not enough to worry about. I tend to think that one in a million is way too high when you consider... that could be as many as one person every day in North America. How many manipulations will you complete in your career?

I Survived a Major Brain Injury...

Before I go any further, let me explain myself. I am in know way, trying to make fun of any individual (except, perhaps, myself) and I know first hand that a brain injury is a very serious thing, but that doesn't mean that we can have a little laugh about them.

I suffered a stroke eight months ago yesterday. By God's grace, and a lot of hard work from many people, I have made almost 100% recovery which is pretty incredible in that short amount of time. Through four months of therapy, I met many people with brain injuries and many people trying to help them. I would, in no way, want to make fun of any of those people or the tragic situation that many of them or in, but because the situation is so somber, many of those people can use a good laugh.

I tried to keep a good attitude when going through therapy. This was very hard some of the time (some days it was harder than the therapy) but I am convinced that the good attitude contributed, greatly, to my remarkable recovery. A good sense of humor improved my attitude, as well as the mood of my doctors, therapists and other patients.

There were many funny stories that came about in my group psychological sessions because it was just 6-8 patients (usually all guys) sitting around and talking about their recovery and the challenges that each one faced. I hope I can share some of the other stories in the future but today I want to concentrate on the one that inspired the design above.

The discussion in group that day revolved around getting back to the real world. Most of the patients had been away from their jobs and such for some time and were soon going to be going back in some capacity. I had been in therapy for ten weeks or so and was starting back to work in a couple more. The doctor asked how I felt about that. (That's always their big question: How does that make you feel?)

I thought for a second and then told him I was pissed off. "I mean I am grateful and all that I was able to recover and get back to some of the things that I was doing before the stroke but, overall, I was pissed off."

He, obviously, wasn't expecting that answer out of me so I went on. 

"I have worked at the same job for almost 18 years, never taking more than a week off at a time (and that was for my honeymoon). I had almost three months of vacation saved up that I could always use in case of an emergency, like this one, but I had hoped that I would get to use it for something more satisfying or productive– or both."

"Now its all gone and what have I got to show for it? I had no fun and got absolutely nothing done for 13 weeks! I feel like I should be given a T-shirt that says... I survived a major brain injury and all I got was this lousy T-shirt."

The doctor got a good laugh out of my comment. He really liked my idea for the t-shirt, even mentioning it several times in the sessions in the last few weeks. It wasn't until my graduation day that I realized the prophetic meaning of it when my Occupational Therapist gave me my T-shirt and sent me on my way. My doctor was sure to be there to see that.

The shirt didn't say my slogan but it may as well had. I joked and promised them that I was going to produce the design and get it printed on some shirts. This is my fulfillment of that promise. I hope Dr. Gillespie and Liz OT at St. John's Rehabilitation Hospital in West St. Louis County will get to see it because I really don't expect to sell any of them, but if you want to check it out go to http://www.cafepress.com/skeetzteez/5779576. I will contribute any profits from sales of this shirt to StrokeNet.

Thanks guys